The calling to write came with some instructions. I needed to be faithful to the task. I needed to not doubt when ideas were lacking. And I needed to be transparent.
Well, I have pretty much failed at all of these. I haven’t been faithful or disciplined. Anything and everything else has come before. Doubts have been plentiful. And transparency is non-existent. I allow others to see what I want them to see most of the time. Of course, there are a few folks who know me best, but even with them I still hide the ugly.
So, here’s what is happening right now in my life…the good, the bad and the ugly.
- I am grieving and missing my parents because two years ago they both died during the holidays.
- My husband and I are going to counseling and learning to deal with his ADHD symptoms. It’s not his fault, but I have blamed him for a long time. He is taking ownership of his stuff and I am doing the same. It’s really hard though, but getting better.
- Being empty nesters is hard too. It’s lonely. The house is quiet. Too quiet.
- Parenting adult children is also hard. They make their own decisions and my control must be relinquished. Trusting God is a must.
- I really am learning to trust Him more. I don’t have a choice. Some time ago the realization hit me that I could live life in a constant state of stress, worrying about the next “whatever” or I could really and truly start trusting Him with all the “whatevers” and find joy in living.
- For as long as I can remember, Jesus has been my constant companion and He still is. He knows me. He loves me. He sees me.
So, there you have it. My life right now, the good, the bad and the ugly. Oh, and another good, I’m getting a puppy for Christmas. 🙂